Saturday, 18 May 2013


The dress

For years I hid under layers and dark clothing. Unfortunately for me I did not realize there was a whole new world out there, waiting for me to discover it. Wearing dresses has literally changed my life. I use to die of heat wearing capris and t shirts all summer long. While working in environments with no air conditioning, torturing myself because I lacked the confidence to try something new. I never had an issue wearing dresses to formal events, but to me, being a big girl was a big enough obstacle, adding extra attention to myself was not something I felt like subjecting myself too. Too many times had I been bold enough to wear something, felt stares on me, and scrapped the outfit… never to be worn again. So one day, I decided to try a casual every day dress on. It was a little tighter around my natural waistline and hit just above the knee. I looked at myself up and down in the mirror and was actually okay with what I saw. I could not believe how flattering it was. I thought for sure my lower belly would be highlighted in an outfit like this. This was not the case at all!! This dress hit me in all the right places. I marched up the check out and bought that damn dress, and every other colour in that style. The first time I attempted to the wear one of the dresses in public, I tried it on and quickly tore it off my body, threw it on the floor and decided nope, not for me. It took a while before I actually felt ballsy enough to wear it. While out for the first time wearing this dress, I didn’t notice any bad looks (none more than usual) or anyone who appeared to be making fun of me. I wasn’t hot, or feeling gross from being overheated. I had no need to wear anything but bra, panties, and a dress. It felt great to not be layered on a hot day.
               There are a few pros to wearing dresses as casual outfits. First and foremost, comfort. If it is the right material and the right cut for your body, they are as comfortable as wearing pj’s out. They are a complete outfit! You don’t need to put any thought into what you are wearing. One dress, is everything put together. Figure out your shoes and accessories and the rest is done. They are much cooler in the summer than any other outfit, except maybe a bathing suit. I cannot express how good I feel when wearing a dress. I really do feel if you find a flattering fit, and cut, you will feel like a million bucks. Which is so important. Us big girls have enough issues with body image and being down on ourselves. We deserve a break and being able to find something that looks just as good on thin people as it does on us.
               The only downfall to wearing dresses, and whether you admit this or not, but goddamn chaffing on your inner thighs. I have heard a variety of remedies from various sized women over the years. Here is a list of a few of the ways us ladies combat the terror that is chaffing.
-deodorant rubbed on at the beginning of the day, or any lotion, sunscreen
-Passion Party Body Dew works like magic. It slickens you up so it’s easier on your skin
-Baby powder, or anything in that family
-Wearing shorts, or even “man underwear” longer boxer briefs can help, and no panty lines

Hopefully this piece has inspired you to go out and at least try on a dress. Even if it takes you ages to have the guts to wear it, give it a shot. Give yourself a break, don’t always try to blend in, and be comfortable. Hopefully it will put a little spring in your step when you see how fabulous you look!

Tuesday, 14 May 2013

Just because it is made in your size does not mean you should wear it

I know I am all about people feeling good in what they are wearing. This, unfortunately, is a tough love piece. Yes, I am a size 20-22, and yes, sometimes I can squeeze my ass into an 18. Is this always a good idea? If I want to breathe, no. Aesthetically speaking, also a no. Just because I can squeeze into something, does not mean it is a good idea. God help the person who might be around when I bust out of my sausage casing!! I recently travelled to the UK, and US and was unexpectedly surprised by the various outfits on us Thick Madam’s that I saw. I saw this beautiful girl in a long maxi dress, lovely from the front, then bam… she turned to the side and there it was… a skin tight profile of a tummy issue. I get it, we can’t always hide our flaws, nor should we be overly concerned about it. However, if that lovely girl had simply purchased a size bigger, she would have looked incredible. I understand some people just want to fit into whatever size they can, but it is not the way.  Another side to this topic is wearing god awful clothing, just because it is made in my size. I recently went into Forever 21, which I happen to love their plus size clothing… for the most part. There was a skin tight mini dress with cut outs in a size 3x, which is my size. Once again, yes it is my size, but is this a good idea. Just because it is available for purchase and in my size, should I wear it?? Probably not. Unless maybe as a bedroom dress! I hate to be negative towards my people (big girls) but just cause you found it in your size, put the damn inappropriate garment down. I understand this is a very vague description of inappropriate, so I will list some possible inappropriate features:
Full open back all the way to the crack
Cut outs of any kind
Short dresses to the point your “Britney” is showing, or could show
Something so tight you can hardly breathe
If the skirt is so tight you need to pee every 5 minutes
If you resemble a packed tight sausage
The ripple effect: if it hugs every nook and roll all the way down, get it off, NOW

Sadly, these articles of clothing do exist. Although I love a girl with confidence, sometimes toning down that outfit choice is the only solution. Make smart choices, do not simply buy everything in your size because it is your size. Hang that garment back up in the store and keep on walking to the next item. Just like partners, there are plenty of fish in the sea, just keep looking and the right one will come along.